Monday, November 9, 2009

Definitions - The Mommie Edition...

condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to have sex again.

Top Bunk:
Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

Two-Minute Warning:
when the baby’s face turns red and she begins to make those familiar grunting noises.

the people who think your children are wonderful even though they’re sure you’re not raising them right.

a woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

a small body of water that draws other small bodies into it.

One who asks if the kids want ice cream.

Family Planning:
the art of spacing your children the proper distance apart at the dinner table, to avoid a food fight.

The gift your kids give you. Even when it’s not your birthday.

Full Name:
what you call your child when you’re mad at them.

what toddlers do when anyone mutters a dirty word.

how we want our children to be as long as they do everything we say.

the first word spoken by children with older siblings.

when your life was still somewhat your own.

what you do to your first baby’s pacifier by boiling it and to your last baby’s pacifier by blowing on it.

none of the kids that live in your house.

1 comment:

Sheri said...

OMG! I forget to read your blog everyday and here Brett and I sit, reading your entry today and really explain things, so spot on with humor! A real talent you have!