It's A Southern Thang

Southern FOLKS know their summer weather report:

 
Humidity
Humidity
Humidity

Southern FOLKS know their vacation spots: 

The beach
The rivuh
The creek

Southern WOMEN know everybody's first name:
HoneyDarlin'Shugah

Southern WOMEN know the movies that speak to their hearts:
Fried Green Tomatoes
Driving Miss Daisy
Steel Magnolias
Gone With The Wind

Southern FOLKS know their religions: 
Baptist
Catholic

Football 

Southern FOLKS know their cities dripping with Southern charm:
Chawl'stn 
S'vanah
Foat Wuth
N'awlins
Addlanna 

Southern WOMEN know their elegant gentlemen: 
Men in uniform
Men in tuxedos
Rhett Butler 

Southern girls know their prime real estate:
The Mall
The Country Club
The Beauty Salon  

Southern girls know the 3 deadly sins:
Having bad hair and nails
Having bad manners
Cooking bad food 

Only a Southerner knows the difference between a hissie fit and a conniption fit, and that you don't "HAVE" them, 
you "PITCH" them.

Only a Southerner knows how many fish, collard greens, turnip greens, peas, beans, etc., make up "a mess." 

Only a Southerner can show or point out to you the general direction of "yonder." 

Only a Southerner knows exactly how long "directly" is, as in: 
"Going to town, be back directly." 


Even Southern babies know that "Gimme some sugar" is not a request for the white, granular, sweet substance that sits in a pretty little bowl in the middle of the table. 

All Southerners know exactly when "by and by" is. They might not use the term, but they know the concept well.

Only a Southerner knows instinctively that the best gesture of solace for a neighbor who's got trouble is a plate of hot fried chicken and a big bowl of cold potato salad. 
If the neighbor's trouble is a real crisis, they also know to add a large banana puddin'! 

Only Southerners grow up knowing the difference between "right near" and 
"a right fer piece." They also know that "just down the road" can be 1 mile or 20.

Only a Southerner both knows and understands the difference between a redneck, a good ol' boy, and po' white trash.

No true Southerner would ever assume that the car with the flashing turn signal is actually going to make a turn..

A Southerner knows that "fixin" can be used as a noun, a verb, or an adverb.

Only Southerners make friends while standing in lines, .... and when we're "in line", we talk to everybody! 

Put 100 Southerners in a room and half of them will discover they're related, even if only by marriage.

In the South, y'all is singular, all y'all is plural.

Southerners know grits come from corn and how to eat them.

Every Southerner knows tomatoes with eggs, bacon, grits, biscuits, and coffee are perfectly wonderful; that red eye gravy is also a breakfast food; and that fried green tomatoes are not a breakfast food. 

When you hear someone say, "Well, I caught myself lookin'," you know you are in the presence of a genuine
Southerner!

Only true Southerners say "sweet tea" and "sweet milk." Sweet tea indicates the need for sugar and lots of it -- we do not like our tea unsweetened. "Sweet milk" means you don't want buttermilk. 

And a true Southerner knows you don't scream obscenities at little old ladies who drive 30 MPH on the freeway. 
You just say,"Bless her heart"... and go your own way.

To those of you who are still a little embarrassed by your Southerness: Take two tent revivals and a dose of sausage gravy and call me in the morning, bless your heart!

And to those of you who are still having a hard time understanding all this Southern stuff.....bless your hearts, I hear they're fixin' to have classes on Southernness as a second language! 

Southern girls know men may come and go, but friends are fahevah !

Dollar Store Shopping

Growing up, I was a dollar store snob.  Thanks to the woman that raised me, I tended to be high strung and snooty.  I thought that's how I was supposed to be...you know, money makes you better than everyone else.  Right?  She thought so.

Then I became a divorced single mother and realized just how hard it was to pay for everything we NEEDED and still be able to entertain and 'spoil' my kids.  I didn't look to my parents for a lot, and as time grew to now I look to them for nothing.  So, I learned the value of dollar stores.

To be honest, before about 9 years ago or so I had never been in a dollar store.  A friend of mine took me in when we were planning a beach trip with all our kids.  I was astounded at what I saw!  Toys, snacks, books, decor, dishware.....ALL FOR A DOLLAR!

Since then, I've graduated to 99 Cent Only Stores and Dollar General.  Although I'm remarried, I still shop like I'm a single mom....shop for the bargains.   I hit up the 99 Cent Only Stores for some groceries and pet things and even dishes, cups and saucers.  Oh, seasonal decorations too!  I even bought some cute purple-y flowers for our Easter table...and they're still alive.

Dollar General has become my weakness.  I've discovered their make up.  Wet N Wild. LA Colors. Covergirl.  Concealer, powders, primer, moisturizer, mascara, eyeliner, eye shadow, lipstick and more.

I'd like to stop the stigma that 'dollar stores' are nasty. Some are 'nasty' just because of the neighborhood they're in. Some customers have no pride whatsoever.  The Dollar General next to a certain grocery store near my house looks like a shit hole, and I'll never step foot in there.  It's just run down and I really don't like the 'clientele' they keep. But hey, that's any store in anywhere if you think about it.

So I go to the nicer, bigger Dollar General just up the road a ways.  I can get acrylic French Manicure nail sets for a buck! And glue for a buck too!  My daughters get make up and shampoo and deodorant and razors.  It's been a life saver. Hell EVEN school supplies!

Ok. That's it.  I'll stop.  I just hate hearing (or reading) how 'dollar' stores get a bad rap.  Hell my own 14 year old GETS IT!  It's saving money and you don't NEED name brand items all the time.

Dead Drops

Officially, a dead drop is a method of espionage tradecraft used to pass items between two individuals by using a secret location and thus does not require them to meet directly. Ooohh...already I'm sold!

I StumbledUpon a site about something called Dead Drops today. The brainchild of artist Aram Bartholl, Dead Drops is an anonymous, offline, peer to peer file-sharing network in public space. USB flash drives are ‘injected’ into walls, buildings and curbs accessible to anybody in public space. Everyone is invited to drop or find files on a dead drop; All they have to do is plug their laptop to a wall, house, or pole to share their favorite files and data. Each dead drop is installed empty except a readme.txt file explaining the project.

Everyone is invited to drop or find files on a dead drop. Plug your laptop to a wall, house or pole to share your favorite files and data. Each dead drop is installed empty except a readme.txt file explaining the project. ‘Dead Drops’ is open to participation.

This concept intrigues me to no end.  As a woman, I'm naturally nosy and getting the chance to see what someone left on a memory stick and leave me own there.... irresistible!

Hot Busy Weekend

The heat here in Texas is a killer!  I am not motivated to do ANYTHING that involves me opening the door and stepping outside.  For weeks I've been saying I need to get in the back yard and rake and bag the leaves, pull weeds and lay some more mulch....I just can't seem to actually do it.

Besides the heat, our AC keeps going out...well the unit outside does.  Then I have to go out there and flip the breaker to get it going and cooling off the house again.  Remember, it's a rent house...so the fix-ups aren't always up to us. This goes on several times a night, when I wake up in a puddle of my own MommieDawn sweat with my clothes sticking to me.  Then it's a cool-down period where there's no way I can sleep. Then sleep, again, only to be awoken by the heat or that damn alarm.  Needless to say all of that combined with sleeping on the sofa (due to the Yeti husband) I'm a bit pathetic in the perky department.

Sunday my oldest started her last choir camp. This is her third year, and starting her senior year of high school, this will be her last year at summer choir camp.  Where does the time go?  She has a blast with about 800 kids from all different schools all together for a week at a college campus studying hard and learning more about singing, reading notes, sight reading and performing.  Of course there's the late night giggle and gossip sessions in her dorm room!

After we got home, I texted her just to check in.  She mentioned how bittersweet it is this year, how much fun she has but so sad this is her last choir camp.  Growing up sucks, doesn't it?

Saturday we did some last minute camp shopping, snacks, water, shorts, toiletries and so on.  She packed and chilled out for the evening.  Sunday we left around 2pm for the almost 2 hour drive to camp.  Let's break this down, MommieDawn style.

I love my husband, I feel I need to mention that because of the amount of bitching I do. I do love him and know that he's my everything and soul mate. With that said, he has patience to learn.  He knows this, and he works on it...but nothing gets under my skin like lack of patience.

I like to say I'm a laid back mom. My priorities are generally what my kids' needs and wants are.  That's how I roll.  I'm a grown assed person, I can handle my shit whenever.  My kids, who didn't ask to be here but I put them on this planet, are more important than myself.  So, that's how my life goes.

When we got the mini-van packed, my daughter was riding with her girlfriend and was to follow us.  I learned that when I was putting my seatbelt on and saw her get in the truck...it was all iffy who was going to ride with whom literally until Sunday.  Ok. No biggie.  She's almost 18 and I'm not going to treat her like she's 3 years old and must ride with mommie.  So, I roll with it.  In my head I say, "Ok, so they'll follow us. No biggie. Let's get going!"  But the mister got bent out of shape because he wanted to take the Toll Road.  "Well, I guess you won't now. No bid deal. Let's go!" I said.  He wanted to save gas by doing the Toll Road.  I didn't want to make the teenagers stop, get more money (as it's her gas money that's being used too) and take the Toll Road.  Just roll with it, dadgummet!

"I don't know why they have to drive separate! I was wanting to save money on gas by taking the Toll Road!"  he said filling the swagger wagon with the stress that permeates his pores. At that point I told him to just go home and spend the day alone, stress free with out us in his hair.  He declined.  The rest of the trip was wrought with fidgeting with the GPS, telling me to be quiet because he couldn't hear the GPS (even though it has pretty arrows telling you where to go) and complaining about the heat.  We were all hot, but nothing makes a kid feel even hotter than when an adult is there exhaling and complaining. At one point the GPS fell off the windshield onto my leg.  I bent over and put it back up.  But if it happened to my husband, it would have been a whole production.  Men and their dramatics.

He reminds me so much of my father - it's scary.  A girl really does marry someone like their father.

When we got to the University to check in, we were a bit early.  But that's ok because we were one of the first to check in....which usually is a LONG line in the heat and hustle and bustle of bags, suitcases and teens.  We got her to her dorm room, waited for her best friend to check in and made ourselves scarce.

I have a problem with lingering.  She's my baby. My first born. My mini-me.   And no matter how many times we do this, I just have a hard time leaving. At least I didn't cry this time. I made sure she was settled and had all her things and then demanded a hug and kiss....and we left.

I love the scenic drive home though.  Old abandoned factories, teenie towns with populations of 500 to 1000...cows and horses and pretty countryside.  We saw a City Hall that literally looked like a temporary building!

Crossing Lake Houston

One of the many abandoned factories

Twin Dorm Bedrooms with sitting room and kitchenette. 

This is about how invasive I got. LOL

Then we stop for sushi, just the three of us.  We went to Wazabi Sushi close to home and it never disappoints.  Ever.  The sushi is fresh and the sauces are divine and the presentation is spectacular.

We ate our weight in sushi I think...(pardon the photos as my Rebel is still not working correctly!)

My husband also ordered clams.  They were good, but a little 'fishy' for my taste.

Now here's where I do some (more) bitching.  Anything new to my Aspie child is a recipe for anxiety.  She's never been to this particular sushi restaurant. So, she was a bit put off by being in a new place. Her general position usually is face down on the table or leaning into me. I suppose to a passerby she just looks exhausted.

The fact that nothing seemed to 'match' weirded her out ...to her the tables and chairs and decor didn't 'match'. LOL  And the ANNOYING couple next to us was about to make me shove both their cell phones up their asses.  Both of them either talking, texting or both at the same time for most of our meal.  These were the type of people who when they talk on their cell phones, they literally scream as if they're talking into bricks from the 80's. Then the husband bickered at the wife, calling her stupid at one point. And FINALLY they left.  I know it bugged me, noises usually do (as I'm an Aspie as well) but I know they bothered my child.  A baby was squawking which bothered her as well.  Babies don't usually bother me, because as a mother of two colicy babies, I couldn't always control the screams.  And I was given my fair share of "Shut The Effing Baby Up!" looks.

Needless to say, by the time we got home we were all exhausted.  Pooped. Ready to change clothes and just relax.  But it wouldn't be that easy.

As I mentioned earlier, our AC boggles the breakers...and I flip them regularly.  And we have a dog that has horrible separation anxiety.  Those two combined made a horrible recipe that day.  It seems that I may not have shut the kitchen door into the garage all the way and Buddy (the dog) must have pushed it open, into the hot garage.

Thank goodness it's into the garage and we lost no pets. Bad news, the garage is about a million degrees, which now was receiving any cold air from the house.  And subsequently, the AC unit had flipped the breakers again.  It was 92 Degrees in the house.  92 DEGREES.  My poor doggie and kitty were no doubt hot as hell and it didn't make any of us feel glad to be home to this steam box.  We put the dog outside and cooled off the cat as well as we could.  And I brewed some tea for ICED COLD SWEET TEA in the meantime.

It took a while, but we finally got the house cooled off...not without the AC unit needing to be flipped again.  Hence the very tired me on this Monday morning.

Be advised that yes we realize it's not normal for an AC unit to do this. We're in a rent house with a landlawd with the speed of a snail fighting a windstorm.