Friday, January 20, 2012

Little Red - A Day With My Aspie

Yesterday I was reading an article about a man and wife who's marriage was almost in shambles until a diagnosis of Asperger's seemed to bring so much to light.  I read part of the article aloud to my 15 year old, who's an Aspie as am I.  It was regarding how an outing needs to be told to us beforehand so we know what to expect. I won't try to explain it, but it has to do with routine and social crap and not ever being fly by the seat of our pants kind of people.  She totally got it and we talked about a weekend to her dad's that was out of the routine ...this weekend. With holidays and birthdays it gets a bit hairy at times trying to keep a regular schedule. Her words were, "It ruined my whole day!" Meaning, she really needed a day to deal with and get over and accept her weekend was going to be elsewhere.

(As a sidenote : getting 3 text messages saying one person, then the other, then the first is going to pick her up and the time is getting later and later isn't helping.)

And for whatever reason, I felt like blogging today on a day with my Aspie. The mister is out of town and the other two teens were in school, so it was just us. I had some errands to run, which is one thing she needs to be made aware of beforehand. Where we're going etc, etc, etc.

Generally, when she runs around with me, and now that she's older, she needs to be reassured that she can sit in the car. Her words, "I hate people." Interpretation, "I hate everyone staring at me." And regardless of the color of her hair (which today was blazing red) and I'm sure someone stares at that, she always thinks everyone is staring at her and it upsets her a great deal.

But let me back up a little bit.  Last night I lifted her purple hair in order to dye it red. This morning she wanted a little bit darker red on top, so that was the first thing done today. And since I was on no one's schedule but hers, I let her know, "Whenever you're ready we'll leave. We're going to the dollar store, the gas station, Radio Shack and another stop."  This was early. Like hours before I was going to leave, she needs that time to digest things. 

Today is Friday, and in home school MommieDawn terms - free day. It's reading day, but no 'work work'.  We also hardly ever watch 'regular' TV. Netflix and BBC shows are our life source. Haha.  But today she wanted to watch Brian Regan.  Ugh. I love this man, because he's hilarious without being filthy. He's just awesome. But, it does take a while to get through it because occasionally I stop the feed and explain one of his jokes. Figure of speech is taken literally from a lot of Aspie's. 

When she was happy with her hair, dressed and ready to we went. First stop was Radio Shack, I needed a new universal battery charger. I exit the car, make sure she locks the doors, even though I'm parked 3 feet from the glass fronted shop, and she's 15 years old, and pop in and out. When I'm back in the car I am greeted with how many people stared at her and how much she hates people. Then to the dollar store, she gets out here because she was getting some snacks. Then gas and one more stop then home. 

She wanted to go with to pick up the high schoolers, which is something she NEVER wants to do because, "I hate people." But today she went because at the dollar store I purchased an iPod adapter that plays through the car radio and she wanted to hook it up. DOLLAR STORE PURCHASES LIKE THIS NEVER WORK.  Yet, for some reason, I still am surprised and get mad. Go figure. When we pull in the parking lot, "Don't park up front!" So I don't, which I never do with her...I parked in the trees.  When the kids were out I usually pull up to get them, but not the 'front'. But I was still reminded not to do it. 

And now I wait for her dad to come pick her up for the weekend. Which she psychs herself out for. While waiting she's playing 'Batman' on her PS3 and a challenge came up. "Riddles?! I don't do riddles well, guys!"  It gave me a giggle.

Some people really don't understand how exhausting life is day to day for the parent of an Aspie. Other's don't want to get it.

So here is my fiery redhead just today. One of the loves of my life. One of my heroes. 
ps - my other love and hero is my other daughter, by the way,.

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