What Balke Shouldn't Write About

I'll open this posting with this : I am no author.  I am no writer.  I'm a blogger. I write about what I want to write about on my blog because it's just that, my blog.  It's not syndicated. I don't get paid as a writer.  It's just me, my laptop and my big mouth making words trickle down to my fingertips. I'm even cool enough to include links to his articles.

Jeff Balke, who writes for The Houston Press, usually chaps my hide with a lot of his articles.  I'm not sure exactly why, but I always feel compelled to bash the articles that peeve me.  He writes as if the reader wants to know what pisses him off and how they can do better to win his love.

He writes a lot of pieces about apps in an 'App Of The Week' blurb. Training apps, iPhone apps and the like are the usual. I don't pay attention to those because my old BlackBerry does me just fine. I can call, receive calls, text and get online with it so I really don't have any complaints.

Then there are other articles that just (to me) have no relevance.  They seem more of just out and out whining about what other people post. He'll tell you what not to post during a football game. He'll tell you, "Unless your friends are swimsuit models posing for you, swimwear shots are off-limits. Period."  My response is, "What a rude assmouth."  I mean, are we all gorgeous in swimwear? No. But Jesus, don't be a douche-hole.

So, I've come up with my own list :  A Handy Guideline Of Things Balke Shouldn't Write About Ever Again.

#5   Anything that annoys him.  I haven't counted, but more often than not my memory recalls articles he's written to be about things that bother him. And a lot of things bother him. He doesn't like your Twitter or Facebook posts that stay on one track.  He says "When your entire wall is covered in links to stories from Fox News or photos of your dog or write-ups on every item of food you've eaten in the last year, I have to question your sanity...and un-subscribe from your feed."  I am not sure how many people he's unsubscribed from or unfollowed on Twitter, but it's probably small.  He's too bothered by what everyone else does.  He fails to see how his whining is very similar to those he's whining about. 


#4  Music. In my opinion, he can't be unbiased. Jeff is a 'musician' and generally he will write with distaste about a lot of music with a closed mind.  He writes about 'indie bands'.  Honestly, there are too many bands classifying themselves as 'indie' when in fact they're just trying to find their footing. As soon as a band 'makes it' they will change formats, dress, sound etc, as the money allows them to do so which it didn't in the past.  Some bands make it, a lot don't.  But I don't look to a local musician for a guideline as to what's hot and what's not when I have two ears on my head. But that's just my opinion.


#3 Email.  Jeff is surprised that someone has one email for everything.  I don't think he realizes not every NEEDS more than one email address.  My parents don't.  I generally still have ONE email that I use for personal and ordering etc.  His reason is so you don't get so much spam.  Not good enough for me. If it's spam, it goes into the spam folder. It seems that too many things bug the shit out of Jeff. Spam is one. Too much clicking?  He implores people to not add attachments or signatures to their emails.  Why? Literally, because it annoys him. Dude, some people use work email where signature and attachments are necessary and not their choice. He then jokes about any animated emoticons, saying, "It's not 1998."  I am very tempted to email him with 75 attached logos and 127 animated emoticons.  He's very annoyed at you. All of you. Almost every article he's telling you he's annoyed at you. He'll also tell you not to send unsolicited warning emails. God forbid someone who is NICE and think they're helping someone out send him an email giving him a heads up about something THEY feel is email-worthy.  I think anyone in a friendship with Jeff needs to have a guidebook on what not to do...it would be a long book.

#2  Food.  Because I'm a vegetarian and have no interest in the food he likes.  I know, I sound just as opinionated as Jeff.  Sounds stupid, huh? lol


#1  ANYTHING Facebook or Twitter related. Ever.
   Jeff has written many times about Facebook and how much it sucks, or it's apps suck or mistakes you make on Facebook.  Sadly, I really think he feels he is doing a social awareness campaign and his musings will change people's postings online. He wrote that people should stop posting drunk photos. He warns that employees look at your social networking and to just stop posting photos of themselves wasted.  But in all honesty he could have SO taken a more serious aspect of it and make it into a story.

  I'd love to help Jeff, but I think I'll pass an idea  of a story I have on to someone else at The Houston Press.  I've been sitting on something that needs to be blown out of the water, something that's not about how annoying people act. His writings, to me, is just fluff. Filler. There's enough fluff in this world.

Cherry Green Monster - Kale Edition

I bought some kale the other day and wanted to try it in a Green Monster. Kale has been called the 'Queen of Greens' by some. Unlike spinach or chard, kale doesn't contain oxalic acid, which prevents the body from absorbing calcium. Kale is the richest of the greens in the phytochemical lutein. Known mostly for its prevention of eye disease, lutein is now thought to be more protective against cancer than beta-carotein.

Kale is also one of the highest sources of antioxidant flavonoids which help ward off heart disease and regulate blood pressure. Kale has many benefits for women. It helps regulate estrogen, and wards off many forms of cancer including breast. The calcium in kale is more absorbable than the calcium in milk so it helps protect against osteoporosis, arthritis, and bone loss. Before and during pregnancy, kale supplies important minerals like calcium and iron. It also provides folic acid which is necessary for proper development of the baby's nervous system. While nursing, kale and other leafy greens increase breastmilk supply.

Children grow and develop at a rapid rate. Proper nutrition is vital. Kale is extremely rich in vitamin A—essential for visual and immune functions. One cup of kale has as much vitamin C as an orange. It provides as much calcium as the equivalent amounts of cow's milk making it an excellent food for vegans,

Kale contains chemicals called goitrogens that may inhibit absorption of dietary iodine. A decrease in iodine in your body can worsen symptoms of hypothyroidism, a condition where your thyroid gland does not produce enough hormones. The hormones produced by your thyroid gland are essential for regulating your metabolism. Goitrogens are almost completely destroyed during cooking, so avoid eating raw kale in excess with hypothyroidism. 

Read more: http://www.livestrong.com/article/519961-greens-kale-thyroid-problems/#ixzz1viBpa0SP




Now, on with the smoothie.  As usual, flaxseed first :

Give it a whirrrr and disintegrate the seeds. 

Add frozen cherries

Fresh, raw kale. I just pull the leafy bits off the

stems and add to blender. 

Add a enough juice to blend. 

Then liquefy!

There you have it!

And as with spinach, you do not taste the kale...only the

fruit. 

And this is my daughter's tongue with all

the residual fruit skin and some kale bits.