I miss my 19 year old so much it's painful. I can't drive the 300+ miles with the car I have and my father-in-law has been working on my minivan so I can travel to see her. It's taking forever. One day it's close to being done, another day there's something else to do on it. Then he got ill. Then there was some familial realty/will/house drama he had to deal with. So, I feel stuck and sad and pity party myself to pieces over it....it's nice that I got an unintentional pick-me-up from my youngest.
Today, my 16 year old asked for my pen. Yes, my pen. I have one pen that I carry on me, in my purse really, that I love so I knew this was something serious she was going to write. Hahaha
She was done with home school lessons for the day, so I wondered what it was. But I didn't ask and let her know where it was and she sat down at the kitchen table with paper and pen and started writing. I was cleaning the kitchen.
She finished and came up to me while I was wiping down the stove and said, "I was writing." "I know, I saw...", I replied...kind of waiting to see if she'd offer up what she was writing....and she did.
My daughter is such a special, sweet young lady. She thanks me every single night for supper. She gives me a hug and a kiss every single night before bed. She tells me she loves me every single day. She yells, "DONE!" in her cute little voice every time she empties the dishwasher, which is something she's done after completing almost everything since the day she said her first words. She's beautiful. She's artistic. She's soft spoken. She's colorful and fun and just a breath of fresh air.
She's also sensitive, almost painfully so. She's very hard on herself. She's unsure of herself at times. She's blunt, but thinks she's being mean. I let her know she's being honest, not mean. I worry about her being so hard on herself. I feel that 24/7, for almost 17 years now, I've been on duty with this child to make sure I'm here to cushion blows, help her work through tough times all the while giving her room to grow on her own but not getting too far away from her.
What she wrote was adorable and touching. At the top of the page it said, "Things I Am Grateful For"...with a heart. Then she listed things like 'my comfy bed' and 'my cat' and 'my mom' and 'my colorful hair and piercings'. She then wrote a few lines about saying something nice instead of mean so she won't get grumpy vibes. And reminding herself to do yoga everyday (which she does and I'm so impressed!) and to be less judgmental because you never know what that person is going through.
I am raising a great kid.